Polarization of America
One of the things that's been bugging me lately is the deterioration of civility in America. I know it's been going on for some time now, but I think the polarizing politics of the '08 election (and President Obama's agenda) have made matters worse. What bothers me most I think actually just a symptom of this trend, and that is the increasing unwillingness of people to talk about politics, at all, ever. We Americans define ourselves so much by religion and politics, yet we've reached a point where we can't talk about either one for fear of starting a riot. This is really a shame.
I meet people all the time when I travel. It's easy to tell the frequent business travelers from the vacationers for a lot of reasons. One of those reasons though is that a couple business travelers who are stuck on a plane together for 4.5 hours will almost certainly strike up a conversation to pass the time. We're not going to talk for the whole flight, and we're not going to become best friends, but we'll talk about current events or our business or something. This is mostly because we're accustomed to being 2 inches away from another person for hours on end in a flying tin can - the casual traveler is not. The casual traveler avoids physical contact at all costs, which is pretty much impossible, especially on a "regional jet." The casual traveler is, typically, too busy trying to remain private and isolated from this person sitting next to them who is probably in closer proximity than his spouse when they're sleeping in the same bed.
When I meet someone on a plane and we get to talking, I often mention a political news story I heard or read about recently. About half the time, they visibly cringe and try to change the subject, which is fine with me. I don't talk about politics because I'm campaigning for one side or the other on a given issue, I talk about politics because I like hearing different perspectives on the issues. I don't care what your stance is. I don't care if you think I'm a communist because I voted for Obama - just tell me that and then explain why.
These polarizing politics have got everyone dividing the world up into us and them. You're either with me or against me, and there's absolutely no chance that our view(s) could overlap at all, ever. That's just ridiculous.
Take health care as an example. If you poll Americans about individual elements of the health care bill, most of us agree on them. Insurance companies waste money and that's part of why premiums are so expensive. You shouldn't be denied coverage for a pre-existing condition. We need to do something about the cost of health care because it's crippling our economy. Doctors spend too much time and money on administrative stuff and worrying about malpractice rather than actually providing care, which is part of the reason fewer and fewer people want to become doctors in this country, which is a problem. Then you ask people if they want health reform and they say "Obama-care? Hell no!"
Now let's talk about integrative negotiation. Two parties in the business world who have differing interests (but some overlap) engage in what's called integrative negotiation because they have some common goals, and because they want to build a relationship both during and after the negotiation process. Compare this with distributive negotiation, which is when you buy a car from a dealership. Generally, every dollar you win is a dollar that comes out of the dealer's profit, and you and the salesman could care less about being friends after the transaction.
Do we all love America? Of course. Do we want to stop health care costs from crippling our economy? Of course. Do we want to stop crazy government spending so that future generations don't have to learn Chinese because they own us? Sure. Well OK then, let's find some common ground. Can't we be civil and discuss this stuff?
I'd hate to think that America at large is "following" the Congress (and the media) towards extreme partisanship. Kudos to Evan Bayh for being honest about the fact that "it's no fun working in Congress these days" because of all the petty crap. I believe him 100% when he said that's why he was resigning - he was ahead in the polls and could've easily won re-election. The point though is that it should be the other way around. It should be reasonable Americans talking with each other about the issues that face our country, and finding common ground. At a minimum, then we could agree that we're not going to keep electing people, from either party, who are too "extremist" to work with the other side.
I meet people all the time when I travel. It's easy to tell the frequent business travelers from the vacationers for a lot of reasons. One of those reasons though is that a couple business travelers who are stuck on a plane together for 4.5 hours will almost certainly strike up a conversation to pass the time. We're not going to talk for the whole flight, and we're not going to become best friends, but we'll talk about current events or our business or something. This is mostly because we're accustomed to being 2 inches away from another person for hours on end in a flying tin can - the casual traveler is not. The casual traveler avoids physical contact at all costs, which is pretty much impossible, especially on a "regional jet." The casual traveler is, typically, too busy trying to remain private and isolated from this person sitting next to them who is probably in closer proximity than his spouse when they're sleeping in the same bed.
When I meet someone on a plane and we get to talking, I often mention a political news story I heard or read about recently. About half the time, they visibly cringe and try to change the subject, which is fine with me. I don't talk about politics because I'm campaigning for one side or the other on a given issue, I talk about politics because I like hearing different perspectives on the issues. I don't care what your stance is. I don't care if you think I'm a communist because I voted for Obama - just tell me that and then explain why.
These polarizing politics have got everyone dividing the world up into us and them. You're either with me or against me, and there's absolutely no chance that our view(s) could overlap at all, ever. That's just ridiculous.
Take health care as an example. If you poll Americans about individual elements of the health care bill, most of us agree on them. Insurance companies waste money and that's part of why premiums are so expensive. You shouldn't be denied coverage for a pre-existing condition. We need to do something about the cost of health care because it's crippling our economy. Doctors spend too much time and money on administrative stuff and worrying about malpractice rather than actually providing care, which is part of the reason fewer and fewer people want to become doctors in this country, which is a problem. Then you ask people if they want health reform and they say "Obama-care? Hell no!"
Now let's talk about integrative negotiation. Two parties in the business world who have differing interests (but some overlap) engage in what's called integrative negotiation because they have some common goals, and because they want to build a relationship both during and after the negotiation process. Compare this with distributive negotiation, which is when you buy a car from a dealership. Generally, every dollar you win is a dollar that comes out of the dealer's profit, and you and the salesman could care less about being friends after the transaction.
Do we all love America? Of course. Do we want to stop health care costs from crippling our economy? Of course. Do we want to stop crazy government spending so that future generations don't have to learn Chinese because they own us? Sure. Well OK then, let's find some common ground. Can't we be civil and discuss this stuff?
I'd hate to think that America at large is "following" the Congress (and the media) towards extreme partisanship. Kudos to Evan Bayh for being honest about the fact that "it's no fun working in Congress these days" because of all the petty crap. I believe him 100% when he said that's why he was resigning - he was ahead in the polls and could've easily won re-election. The point though is that it should be the other way around. It should be reasonable Americans talking with each other about the issues that face our country, and finding common ground. At a minimum, then we could agree that we're not going to keep electing people, from either party, who are too "extremist" to work with the other side.
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